Hogan's Alley

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Paris Hilton, Some Pigs Are More Equal Than Other Pigs


The next time you hear a impoverished resident of your local ghetto complain that justice is doled out more harshly in their neighborhood than it is for the rich, agree with them. It has now been irrevocably proven true.

Paris Hilton, after about 72 hours in the hoosegow, has been released for "medical reasons", which must conveniently be kept confidential. In the process she was credited with a full five days of service of her original 45 day sentence. Wise in the ways of the penal system, her lawyers obviously counseled her to enter the jail just before midnight, there by accruing one full day. She was released just after midnight to accrue an additional full day. That is how three days are morphed into five days through the application of lawyerly magic.

TMZ.com is now further reporting that Paris was released for psychiatric reasons, not physical health issues.

Normally, I would avoid blogging about America's greatest pathological fame chaser at all cost. But this event reaches across the line from the swamps of celebrity shenanigans into the health of the body politic.

How, in the name of God, can the LA County Sheriff and his minions condone such hanky panky? There is no fable they can construe that allows Paris' tears or depression to merit a get-out-of-jail-free-card. It is inconceivable that she is the first person in their jail who was miserable there. That is why the term "suicide watch" was invented. Further, there is no excuse related to post-traumatic stress that could have or should have required the obviation of her sentence. She, more that almost anyone, would be able to afford the finest mental health treatment available after she served her sentence. Jail is supposed to hurt.

So she is now free to relax at home with family and friends for 40 days, (or 38 in the counting method of the Sheriff). Party on dudes!

If I were a resident of LA County I would be ashamed of the Sheriff and in such a state of fury that I would immediately join with anyone available to assure that the Sheriff, Leroy D. Baca, is recalled from his elected office at the earliest opportunity. He is a national disgrace and and a menace to our aspirations to equal justice.

I want to also say that before surrendering to the Sheriff, Hilton made statements that were the most intelligent, adult and responsible of her "career". I was impressed. Now I just think that it was all part of the game. She previously had seemed to believe herself above the law. She was right all along.

Her lawyers will now be able to advertise their new practice specialty. No Hollywood celebrity will ever need to suffer the indignities of the pokey again, almost regardless of their crime.

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